Presidential Address Lasts Hours as Biden Keeps Trying to Say ‘Omicron’ Correctly [Satire]
by Babylon Bee
December 21, 2021
WASHINGTON, D.C.—The presidential address to the nation was intended to be a brief message of hope and resilience for Americans facing a possible COVID-19 surge, but ended up lasting hours as President Biden kept trying to pronounce “Omicron” correctly.
“I’ll tell you what, America’s unvaccinated lower class are in for a real whuppin’ with the surge of this new variant they call Omnomicromicon…Omnicormorant, Obercrombie, Omnibus, Comic-Con,” said the leader of the free world, squinting into the teleprompter, “Oblong Prawn, Amish Pawn, Auger Spawn…”
An hour into Biden’s attempt to say a simple, three-syllable word, some members of the White House press corps could be heard snoring, and the video feed began tilting upward toward the ceiling as the camera operator dozed off.
Hope returned to the press room after three hours, though, as many thought Biden had correctly enunciated the name of the mild variant, but staffers clarified that he had actually said, “Balmy Cob,” followed by, “Otter Crop, Mommy Clod, Clammy Lawn, Only Fawns, Olmec’s Crop Top…”
Sources expect Biden’s address to be completed by the time the next variant is announced.
Truth Comes to Light highlights writers and video creators who ask the difficult questions while sharing their unique insights and visions.
Everything posted on this site is done in the spirit of conversation. Please do your own research and trust yourself when reading and giving consideration to anything that appears here or anywhere else.
